Toxic Thoughts

I watched Joel Osteen last week, & the premise was how we need to stop listening to toxic thoughts & remember who we are. Of course, he meant it in terms of remembering that we are all God's children, preparing to fulfill some destiny, (which is a blog topic in itself) but I'm not trying to Bible thump. I see his sermons as more motivational & inspirational, rather than religious.

It had me thinking of just how true it is, letting in these toxic thoughts. We start listening to negative things, & begin questioning ourselves, our feelings, our thoughts, & sometimes the basic core of who we really are as a person.

I read a couple blogs recently that all tie into this subject. Each from a different perspective. One pointed out just how cutting words can be from others, especially under the guise of "just being brutally honest". His point was that it doesn't show much class, & it's just another way of being cruel. Have you ever been on that end of that honesty? Basically, you either end up thinking, "what a bitch", OR, you start feeling like crap about yourself. I've walked away from conversations feeling beaten down....wonder if that makes the "honest" person feel better in comparing us?

We all carry our own personal demons & deal with them in our own way, in our own time. Some can deal with them head-on, quickly dispensing them from their thoughts, & move forward. Others turn outward, causing havoc & chaos to everyone around them, releasing their demons, "spitting out the venom" (as one of my old managers used to say).

And still others bury them, especially if we start listening to others & their negative thoughts. As a friend pointed out in her blog, we're told by people...our friends, family, society, whoever....to move on, quit dwelling, get over it, etc. I have another friend that says her dad's famous line was, "What are you crying about? Get over it". She started to think that she shouldn't feel bad, & by all means, don't let on if you do. Same with the advice my mom gave me, when I was the fat kid getting picked on in school. "Don't let them know it bothers you." So I didn't, but it did. You begin to conform to feeling in terms of what's acceptable. Or, some will compare what you're dealing with to their own problems, & they don't have the same degree of severity, so yours are quickly discounted. That doesn't change how you feel, or negate your feelings, it just encourages you to keep it to yourself, because you start to believe that yours doesn't compare, or it isn't rational to feel as you do.

Negative thoughts come at us in all forms, whether it be our family, friends, coworkers, bosses....when was the last time you were handed a compliment at your job? I know MY boss is quick to point out anything wrong, but do something right, & it appears to be overlooked. Sometimes it seems we're surrounded by these toxic thoughts, about a variety of subjects, & these thoughts start seeping in. It's important to dispel those types of negative & toxic thoughts & focus on ourselves, & that it's okay to feel, & heal, & do it in our own time. We need to do what's right for ourselves & our own happiness, despite what others try to tell us.

**Sigh** Easier said than done sometimes....an ongoing process...